Welp, here it is: the craziest thing you will read on the Internet today. This is an actual email, I actually received at my actual job.
For those who don’t know, I work at a medical company. Who this clown is and why he sent this to me is, and will forever remain, a mystery.
Guys, get into Mylanta stock like now, because Breaking Bad is around the corner and being FUCKING SHITTY RICH sounds sweet.
Anonymous asked: can i recite your cheesy biscuit post as a monologue
Most definitely, cuz.
Remember that awesome song from the beginning of “A Goofy Movie”? Well, this is it. The guy who sang it, Tevin Campbell, made it unavailable to Spotify. This is a tragedy. Please write your local congressman.
Here’s an album of music from Pete & Pete. I hope it’ll make your day a little bit better.
Fractured Penis AMA →
When you fractured it did you hear anything or just felt it?
I’m reading this thread on Reddit about a guy who fractured his penis while having sex. Here he describes the actual injury. I almost fainted.
streetvgold asked: P.S.-I've noticed your a pizza person, so you need to try dipping your pizza in honey sometime no joke it's heavenly. Some french pizza restaurant owner gave my parents this tip years ago and it has been a tradition in the family ever since.
I am quite the pizza person, and I have dipped my crusts in just about everything one can imagine. Honey is pretty correct, but, and I know this is going to sound fucked up, try dipping it in ginger ale. Let it just soak in and take a big soggy bite. Cash money.
streetvgold asked: You should try making your spaghetti the way Buddy does in the movie Elf. It is surprisingly delectable and I think you would enjoy it(:
The heart…IT BURNS.
